Memory’s Essence in Jodi Picoult’s "Vanishing Acts"
- cleocuizon
- Aug 25, 2022
- 10 min read
Updated: Feb 27
Written By: Cleo C.
Date: 25 Aug 2022

Table of Contents:
Pictures, videos, and dreams are three sources that contribute to humanity’s necessity to store memories. Whether or not it provides a direct image of someone or something, a simple item could hold a vital recollection of a person’s life. An author demonstrates this through a novel that centralizes memory and its impact on the human condition. Jodi Picoult’s Vanishing Acts focuses on a woman named Delia, who loses a remembrance of her childhood and aims to discover it amid a normal and tranquil life. Her journey begins when her father faces a restraining order for kidnapping her old self, Bethany Matthews (Picoult 2005). The story introduces the cruciality of remembrance and its effect on a person’s perception of life. Through this, Picoult’s novel explores the concept of memory in Delia’s journey by emphasizing its role as a paradigm of reality.
Memory’s significance through Delia
At age six, Delia perceived one fun day with her father as a simple vacation. Little did she know, he accomplished kidnapping her daughter to start a new life in New Hampshire (Picoult 372-375). Years later, Delia fails to retrieve these events, leaving her clueless about her real name, Bethany Matthews. However, Picoult’s usage of symbolism proves how memories signify a fundamental gateway to one’s true self. Since the protagonist could not recall vivid details of her past, she develops recurring dreams that leave clues to her lost childhood, “I am little, and he has just finished planting a lemon tree in our backyard… I want to make lemonade, but there isn’t any fruit because the tree is just a baby…He comes over and takes my hand. Come on grilla, he says.” (Picoult 18).
The symbolism occurs through the vision, where the lemon tree and the word grilla resemble a remnant of Bethany Matthews. Picoult’s method infers memory’s essence as a preliminary key for self-discovery. Delia knew that lemons could not grow in New Hampshire, so defining the image’s purpose lingers annoyingly in her thoughts (Picoult 22). As for the term grilla, knowing that it was not a common phrase in the region leaves Delia with more unanswered questions, “What does grilla mean?” (Picoult 19). To appear incessantly in her consciousness indicates vital information for the protagonist to discover. Based on how these elements did not correlate to any New Hampshire source, they imply that the truth exists elsewhere. As it signifies a mysterious paradigm of her reality, she unlocks a key that will give answers about her lost childhood.
How Did the Theme Contribute to Loss of Innocence?
The theme’s prevalence contributes to a loss of innocence using her memories. Her life in New Hampshire was the only aspect she knew about herself. When she questions her father about her mother’s existence, he lies by declaring her dead (Picoult 88). Delia took every word from him as the truth until an arrest warrant from the police entered their doorstep (Picoult 25). Although she insists, he admits to the crime and confirms her real identity as Bethany Matthews (Picoult 26). At this moment, Delia’s clear view of her life turns opaque, unable to process what has been revealed. The world she once knew now seems strange, realizing how most of it was almost a lie. Such events made Delia evaluate a paralleled situation to her loss of innocence:
“Blue, you insist. Blue as the ocean. Blue as a whale. Blue as my daughter’s eyes. But that person shakes his head, and everyone else backs him up. Your poor girl, they say. All of those things— the ocean, the whale, her eyes— they’re green. You’ve gotten them mixed up. You’ve had it wrong all along.” (Picoult 92).
The following text analogizes Delia’s issue as seeing blue represents her old perception of life. But the person correcting the judgment could parallel her father’s arrest and the following events that share her actual existence. Delia then learned that entering Arizona holds a handful of answers to her identity, and unhealed wounds that she did not remember existed. After her father’s arrest caused a change of view, the events enhanced her loss of innocence by revealing the reason behind the kidnapping. While her father stays confined in Arizona, Delia follows and uses her visit to regain memories from the past (Picoult 74). This process had to begin with meeting her mother, Elise. After receiving her parent’s perspective of her old life and correlating it to her dreams, Delia analyzes the motif that drove his father to commit a crime.
According to the text, she discovered that her mother had a past addiction to alcohol after a miscarriage (Picoult 146-147). Elise’s circumstances then radiated towards young Bethany, where teachers noticed negligence in the child’s appearance, “Sometimes Bethany came to school disheveled or wearing dirty clothes.” (Picoult 247). Another sign of neglect includes a scorpion-biting incident that Delia’s fiancée, Eric, retrieved from hospital records as his father’s lawyer (Picoult 257). The following document stated Delia’s “difficulty breathing, nausea, and double vision” after a scorpion sting in her left shoulder (Picoult 257). Amid her critical condition, the document also stated that Elise entered the hospital intoxicated (Picoult 259). The incidents show how her mother’s addiction led to child abuse, which was why her father had to take her away. Knowing that her kidnapping involved brokenness in her family caused an emotional toll, “For someone who can’t remember very much, there seems to be a lot I can’t forget” (Picoult 272). The juxtaposing statement expresses confusion between Delia’s recollections and each parent’s confession. She consciously knew that she could not remember the events, yet her memories revealed much of what she once was. An attempt to recover her childhood led from one controversy to another, and trying to merge what she remembers and what she once felt as Bethany was overwhelming.
As she perseveres through each piece of information, a discussion with Elise’s current husband unlocks a critical answer to her disappearance. This solution refers to the lemon tree dream, where Delia heard grilla through Victor. Once Victor said it, an elaborated version of the same memory appeared:
“Grilla. I am watching him plant the lemon tree. I’ve gotten tired of dancing around it. I want to make lemonade, already…He comes over and takes my hand. Come on, grilla, he says…He swings me up onto his shoulders. He clasps the backs of my legs, to steady me. His hands are butterflies on the insides of my thighs.” (Picoult 398)
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